Traveling in time

I just keep on walking to places to find, there where I stood a while ago.
I’m looking back at decisions I made. I try
to see myself standing there and see what I must have thought.
I am trying to make myself see where it had me brought.
I question. I stop. I stand.
If I only knew, would I have changed my pad?

I feel myself slowly driving back in time, but cannot get a grip on what had passed away.
It has drifted away with the waves of time passing by.
I see the memories more clear at the place I’ve just arrived. I see myself,

and I see you.
But I can still not get closer to that pace at that time. 
I can just feel how it must have felt to not know where that moment would bring me.


I should stop chasing for the past. I just long for the moments that you were where I was.
Those places where we stood so close together. It feels cold now without you there.
I know nothing special happened.
Just another day, another place, the only difference was that you were there.
Not just a place. Not just a time.

I see myself standing there, happy and curious about the unknown.
Eager to learn, what I have learnt now.
Now.
Thinking and looking at myself I see, that I knew all along what was going to happen. I tried to keep myself from getting hurt, but I couldn’t. I had to run to these places.
Now.
Thinking and looking at myself I see, that I wouldn’t change a thing. I would do it all again.
Except for going to that one place, where I was alone, without you for a while. I said goodbye.
Now.
I wish I could change that in saying hi.

I just keep on walking to these places to see you again; to make the change happen in my mind.

C. 

Plaats een reactie